Volume 4, Issue 1 - February 2004
Oh!
No!
It's
Tune
Up Time
Again**
by Diane
Jones
If you can see yourself or your bunnies in the following comical story and would like to take a tune up class (A.K.A. "How the blazes do I clip my bunny's toe nails?" class), contact Dawn Gleasure at dgleasure@aol.com or 720-344-2731. Tune up classes are offered free of charge to House Rabbit Society members and individuals who have adopted their bunny(s) from other animal shelters. If you've taken the class in the past and are still having difficulty, don't hesitate to take the class again.
I feel like a big moron, but I just can't trim my rabbits' nails. It is that time again, and I've just had the third failure in as many days. I simply cannot get these two to cooperate. I sit here bleeding from a fierce strike from the mighty hind paws of the four pound terror I normally call my little sweetie-pie.
The
Bunny
Burrito
Method
I have
tried
the
bunny
burrito
method.
Ha,
ha .
. .
oh see
the
contents
of the
"burrito"
squirm
wildly
and
pop
out
of the
towel.
See
the
manic
kicking.
Hear
the
angry
grunts.
Feel
the
scratching.
I might
as well
be trying
to clean
the
hooves
of a
greased
pig.
I'd
probably
have
more
success
in that
situation!
The
Leg
Wedge
Technique
I have
tried
the
method
recommended
by our
local
HRS
chapter
manager,
which
involves
turning
the
bunny
onto
its
back
and
wedging
it lightly
between
my legs.
Wild,
alarmed
kicking
is the
result,
this
time
accompanied
by squeaks
of alarm
and
combined
with
twisting
and
squirming.
I am
truly
afraid
that
the
bunny
will
break
its
back
with
all
the
twisting
and
kicking
to get
away.
So I
give
up .
. .
I let
him
go.
The
one
time
I managed
to successfully
trim
my female
rabbit's
nails
using
this
method,
her
bonded
mate
(normally
so friendly)
spent
the
entire
time
grunting,
charging,
and
biting
me in
the
rear
end
to make
me let
her
go.
Gosh,
was
that
ever
a lively
distraction!
Luckily
for
me,
he was
fixated
on the
thick
seam
on the
back
pocket
of my
jeans,
so I
was
not
injured.
The
jeans
pocket
was
lacerated.
It is worth noting, however, that when the HRS chapter manager tries this "on the back" method of nail trimming, my rabbits hold almost completely still. They just lie there all deceptively docile, with their paws in the air. "Oh, a trim? For me? Thank goodness! I've really been craving another manicure." Grrr!
The
Hunching
and
"Trancing"
Approaches
I have
tried
coming
in from
behind
a bunny,
hunching
over
her
and
holding
her
in place
for
trimming.
Again,
abject
failure.
I have
tried
holding
them
like
a football,
with
their
heads
under
my arm.
I have
read
up on
"trancing"
a bunny
and
tried
very
hard
to get
my bunnies
into
such
a state.
Again,
it is
to laugh.
Apparently,
my rabbits
are
not
susceptible
to hypnotism,
mesmerism,
and
wouldn't
know
a trance
if it
came
up and
nipped
them.
I always end up paying the HRS manager to do the job for me. I really need to be able to do this myself as we are planning on moving and the area we are heading into doesn't have a rabbit rescue.
The
"Oh,
I'm
not
really
going
to clip
your
nails"
Strategy
I've
tried
working
with
the
rabbits
in between
trims,
petting
them
with
the
clippers,
touching
their
paws
with
the
clippers,
picking
up their
paws
and
putting
them
back
down.
But
they
aren't
stupid.
No-sirree
Bob!
They
KNOW
that
I don't
actually
mean
to trim
the
nails
at those
times.
They
sit
calmly
and
permit
me to
handle
their
paws
. .
. watching
and
biding
their
time
until
I actually
try
to trim
a nail.
In desperation, I've even tried explaining to them that their own good health is in the balance here and that I don't get some sick jolly out of harassing them about nail trims. Clearly, they don't speak English.
I have tried everything but handing them the clippers and having them trim their own nails!
**Editor's
Note:
The
HRS
chapter
and
chapter
manager
mentioned
in this
story
are
not
part
of the
Colorado
organization.
